Today just seemed all wrong. In my digitools class, we were learning how to type numbers into spread sheets and it kept on showing up the devil's number to type. I will probably get graded down for skipping part of the assignment, but I refuse to type that horrible number. Then in second period, (PE) we're playing a tennis tournament. My partner's been gone for the past two days, so I've been playing singles. My team has won, out of maybe 15 matches, only 4. It has not improved while my partner was gone. I lost every match I played, and got angrier with each loss. And today, my last match, I finally lost my temper, and did something unG-dly, and I feel like I could never call myself a Christian. I'm sickened to my very core and want to hurt myself. I almost broke down in tears after I realized what I'd done. I'm frightened by this rage, and don't know what to do. Somebody help me.

[b]Bittersweet wrote:[/b] [quote]Today just seemed all wrong. In my digitools class, we were learning how to type numbers into spread sheets and it kept on showing up the devil's number to type. I will probably get graded down for skipping part of the assignment, but I refuse to type that horrible number. Then in second period, (PE) we're playing a tennis tournament. My partner's been gone for the past two days, so I've been playing singles. My team has won, out of maybe 15 matches, only 4. It has not improved while my partner was gone. I lost every match I played, and got angrier with each loss. And today, my last match, I finally lost my temper, and did something unG-dly, and I feel like I could never call myself a Christian. I'm sickened to my very core and want to hurt myself. I almost broke down in tears after I realized what I'd done. I'm frightened by this rage, and don't know what to do. Somebody help me.[/quote] Well, I dont know what you did, but whatever you did, remember that God can and will forgive you. No Matter What. Please dont hurt yourself, i mean, if you think about it, Your body is a temple in which the Lord dwells in. When you hurt yourself, you hurt God too. Also, A very wise thing to do is to find someone, older than you at church with whom you can talk to. Maybe your pastor or pastor's wife, or any other person at your church that you would feel comfortable sharing this with. They can pray you through it, and be there for you. I talk with my pastor's wife, and it really helps. And, Remember, no matter how bad it was, God is a loving, forgiving God. If he were not, I, most assuredly would be dead by now. Prayin for ya! Jaryd

Hey, don't be so hard on yourself. I know, I know, that probably isn't what you want to hear (I certainly never do), but the best thing to do when the walls are closing in is to lighten up and laugh a little. There is NOTHING that you could do that could seperate you from the love of God. Hey, no matter how many times we strike out, fail, mess up, fall down, get bloody, say hurtful/wrong things, or do hurtful/wrong things, God will always take you back. I don't know what you did to make yourself feel so horrible, but if you simply ask God's forgiveness, God will forget about it, and with practice and time, you will too. Hang in there, this won't last forever, thank God!!! Romans 8:38 "And I am convinced that nothing can seperate us from God's love. Neither death, nor life. Neither angels, nor demons. Neither our fears for today, nor our worries for tomarrow- not even the powers of hell can seperate us from God's love." Just a side note, one that I have had a hard time learning- To feel that you are no longer worthy to be God's child, a follower of Christ, is to give in to Satan's lies and give him a stronghold in your heart. James 4:7 "...Resist the devil, and he will flee from you." (Lies and all!)